Boiling Out

Trying to pray into this
Try into this
I'm scared of all of this

I dream of it
On my mind all of the time
I'm going crazy because of it
Leaving him behind
Money could be easy this time

That's what keeps me up
The gambling
The coins dropping one by one
And a heart
My heart

I'm trying into this
To see if it fits
Alone in the woods away from ebbs and flows

Escaping something
Escaping the erase of something

I'm trying this out again
Moving again
I'm having anxiety again
Trying this out
Praying into this
Fear: I have boiling out


written May 2008